A recent client is a young graduate from a small, Midwestern college trying to figure out his future. He comes dressed in a well-fitting suit and displays impeccable manners, and his natural personality is charmingly introspective. However, he is clearly hesitant to want anything. The “shoulds” of his career are outweighing the “coulds” of life. So I tell him my office is a safe space for him to explore possibilities.

“You’re 26,” I tell him. “It’s dream time. You may never get this chance again in your life, so tell me what you want.” After a long hesitation, it is clear he knows what he wants, but is afraid to verbalize it.

The fear of the seemingly impossible is severe, which is common across many age groups. Finally, within the prolonged silence, I inquire what he would regret later in life if he hasn’t completed it earlier. This releases the abhorrent ghost and elicits a response. Simply put, the fear of failure has been one-upped by the fear of regret later.

He admits he wants to work in the film and television industry, with a look of resignation that it is likely to never happen.

“Has anyone told you that you can’t?” I ask.

“No,” he replies, mentioning a supportive family, including a relative working in Los Angeles.

“So maybe we need to get you into a graduate program in LA,” I suggest. “That’s where the action is, if you’re up for it.”

Perking up, he asks whether I think he really could. I am honest.

“Maybe,” I say. “Depends on your commitment. It’s a tough business. People will be mean, and you’ll need the proverbial ‘nerves of steel.’ But at the same time, they are going to hire someone; why shouldn’t it be you?”

I inquire whether he has a script or a tape ready to present to graduate programs, and he says he does. I request his research on graduate school programs for another meeting at a later date.

“OK,” he says with enthusiasm, “I can do that.”

I’ll be watching my email closely for a demo or script and the research he brings, or doesn’t. I am hopeful for both. Employment in what he wants to do is a long shot we both acknowledge.

Fear is a disabling power, but power, nonetheless, that can be redirected to possibly crack open a door. Fear, accepted, can become permanently debilitating in any business.

Without taking the chance, one never knows.

Winter break is the perfect time to meet with college students to work on graduate school applications, internship interview preparation and résumés for upcoming career fairs.

As I met with one client this winter, though, he noted having a particularly rough senior semester with one professor. On a 100-point scale, his first two essays received failing grades, while he was thriving and successful in his other courses.

With serious aspirations for graduate school, he expressed concerns with his GPA. The client not only was kind but also actively listened and presented well verbally. We just needed to distinguish how to be successful with a difficult professor. If ever you face a similar situation, at whatever level, here are five strategies that could help you succeed:

1. Visit professors during their office hours. Listen carefully to what matters to them about the performance they expect. Take notes to show you care and to reflect on.

2. Never focus solely on grades. Professors are educators interested in what you learn. A student who keeps focusing on the grade looks too needy or, worse, superficial. Better to discuss the concepts presented in class and how you can meet expected goals of learning.

3. Class participation counts. No professor wants to talk to a silent audience that shows up because they have to. Listen, then ask a relevant question or make a comment politely. Even if your professor thinks you’re wrong, you’ll be memorable for the effort. Do not argue too strongly.

4. Know the book the professor talks about most. He or she probably wrote it, referring to it with substance. It’s also important to know especially for essay exams.

5. Accept suggestions. My client’s professor suggested he consult with the writing center on campus. Following suggestions often helps and always shows effort. It’s tougher to downgrade someone who shows he or she is really trying.

Following these tips, my client raised his grade from an F to a C+. Not bad. He already has two graduate school interviews scheduled by invitation.

When applying to college or interviewing for employment, it’s important to express how much and why you are interested in a college or company. Hiring personnel and interviewers both want to surmise that you will graciously accept an offer, which may require research on your part. According to a recent survey conducted by a group of senior managers, interviewers were most frustrated with candidates that have little or no knowledge of a company.

Many colleges feel the same way. Since a lot of application deadlines are in January, let’s focus on the colleges’ viewpoint. One theory is that the colleges are interested in what is called their yield, the percentage of students a given university accepts who decide to actually attend that university. For example, if Harvard accepts 6 percent of its applicants, the university wants all to attend. Then, its yield will be 100 percent, which would look very good in the ratings media. However, even Harvard won’t get 100 percent. It’s likely its yield will be around 95 percent because some accepted will opt out to attend other Ivy League schools or Stanford. Colleges, though, want the highest yield they can get.

Your chance to show your level of interest is in the supplements within the application. Almost every competitive college has one that asks, “Why are you interested in us?” For students weary of the whole application process by December, this additional writing is often unwelcome. It may be tempting to be a tad redundant and general, simply writing one answer and plugging it into each application. As in: “I like the campus. You have good academics and a high rating. …” That, however, is uninspired and dull – something colleges see through within seconds. It would be better to say, “I am attracted to Duke for the Pratt School of Engineering, where Professor X is exploring Y.” Or, “The University of Michigan has such a vibrant feel academically and culturally. The Ross School of Business offers Z, plus football in the Big House!” Even if you are applying to several colleges, it’s important to take time to write different answers for each college. Who knows, studiously delving into the why may help you ultimately decide where you truly want to go.

When all else is equal, many say the college will likely choose the student who explains best why he or she is likely to choose it! So those of you still writing, hang in there, even though you’re likely tired, especially with the distractions of the upcoming holiday season! Research your answers to supplements, and remember, the end of the work is near. Do it well. You may be very glad you did!

Cellphones have become an integral part of our world. Not only do they allow us instant connection to the ones we love, but also they allow a plethora of capabilities right at our fingertips – whether it be internet access, email or more.

In a world so connected, it’s hard to think of a time before cell phones. However, generationally, one may be able to tell minor behavioral differences in those who lived in the time before cell phones and vice versa.

My client base ranges from those aged 13 to 70 or older. While the youngest are usually innocently inquisitive and talkative, things begin to change once they hit 16 to 18 years of age. From my experience and observation, in the last 10 years, writing quality has seen a decline as the prominence of the cellphone has risen.

I personally think the difference in writing ability relates directly to cellphones. Originally meant as mobile calling devices, cell phones have evolved into a teenager’s lifeline to texting, email, Googling and the whole world of social media. This occurs right when they most need to communicate well in writing and speaking to the rest of the world. One cannot explain to a college who one is and who one wants to become through a phone.

One example involves a highly accomplished, athletic sophomore who was upgraded to the varsity team late in the season for the state finals. I asked him how it felt to put on that varsity uniform for the first time. In the shorthand of today, he simply said, “Great!” After gentle prodding, he elaborated.

“Well, it was better than a T-shirt with tape on it.”

I inquired how the new uniform was better, and he responded with the brand – Nike.

I pressed further, asking, “How did it make you feel? Was it inspiring?”

As he said yes, he grabbed his phone, offering to show me a picture – a picture that showed everything he didn’t describe in words. It was dry-fit with the team color’s stitching. He was proud it showed his name and new varsity number. Seeing the picture, he started to talk, big-time. He expressed the energy colleges want to hear. However, he hadn’t written anything he expressed in the essay he’d submitted. Enabled, he finally described many feelings, which created an uplifting essay. He was accepted to a competitive college.

It’s commonly said that a picture is worth a thousand words. However, colleges won’t know better if you fail to write about the experience that hypothetical picture represents. Use your cellphone as a communication tool, as a source of information and as inspiration.

“What other schools are you looking at?” is a tough question a lot of high school seniors face during college admission interviews. When preparing students for such all-important interviews, I ask them the same question preemptively. A majority dutifully recite their entire list, but there’s a better way to go.

Although it’s technically none of the interviewer’s business, you certainly can’t say that without being rude; nor can you say, “None,” as it wouldn’t be honest. However, you do have a right to privacy. Prepare a truthful answer that is concise but doesn’t spill all the beans.

Here’s a successful strategy devised years ago that answers the question honestly and briefly, and guides the conversation back to its purpose: how you and that particular college are a good fit.

Mention one other college you’re applying to that has similar admission requirements (such as ACT scores or GPA) and that is, preferably, in the same region. As an example, use Harvard for an MIT interview, then circle back to the school at hand, giving a specific reason for your interest. For example: “I’m also applying to Harvard, but I’m particularly interested in MIT because their biology major involves a chance for undergraduates to participate in research.” This is where your own pre-interview preparation is crucial, as your reason must be real with specific details. End your answer with a simple question like “Can you tell me more about that?” Ending with a question throws the ball back into the interviewer’s court, so the interviewer has to think and answer. In the process, the interviewer will likely forget the initial “what other colleges” issue altogether.

If the interviewer doesn’t know the details of the specific program or major you inquire about and seem stymied, you can gently change your question to something like “What made your experience at MIT particularly fulfilling for you?” This works especially well at those one-on-one interviews in coffeehouses with an alumnus or alumna who has volunteered for interview duty simply out of love for his or her alma mater.

Clients from the last 15 years have provided feedback that this strategy works very well, quickly defusing a question you don’t really want to answer while helping you learn more about the college and keeping the conversation on track. A triple win – try it!